Conclusion is made

I will start on a list of to find again and get some one in to do a part at some point next year ... to clear in debris to move on ... and from ... 

This will free up to form some form of productive life again ... 

Memories from last year

now appearing in reminders once not there ... in such recent times of mine ... 

One word does not describe it ... when one lost so much time only few can really know and less when it is in different circumstances to war or conflicts different ... 

Tis still busy

out up at the store from the internet research stats ... not that I always believe what I see ... only it is that time of year... I really do not need any more madness in surround.. after my bath I put on my relax attire ... now I am more in the mood of a hibernation ... than venturing out in ... bumping trolleys and sorry's ... 

... ?? ... Sleeps to countdown ...

... the entrance with the sleeps in countdown at the superstore is in the opposite direction to my end of town ... I have no idea today how many? All I know is I had hoped to venture out last night again to get in supplies for packed lunch in readiness ... 

Unfortunately a bit of a fracas just outside, opposite me with a lot of shouting and banging about including my door in the way of the anger ... ... I stayed put ... a combination of Friday night and festive expectations where tempers get more frayed! 

I anticipated instead to go out early today ... then realising it is now heaving in the shops in festive countdown manic madness  ... 

I may go later ... ???? 

A bumpy ride

in a week anew old .... the must be tiniest office in a building filtering in and out all the goodness of kind in society... 

And many windowless rooms ... 

The previous environment in a town in Kernow was beautifully planned ... which I believe there are rumblings for a change in venue? The building was designed to have windows all round. The day room like a summery feel all year round ... 

The Christmas lights and trees put up. The tree on a busy market day ... The day the council run over time to clear the debris by such market days  ... 

The fear in thy love

of explore ... the thundering tensions. I am in wind down and up mode in transition of retrieve and remove ... 

... to get to assist others ...

....where others think I am swarmed by social interaction ... I continually am met by professionals who supposedly do not realise after such terrible unrelenting isolation of hate for Mental Health ... I am OK ... 

I am not being funny ... but social media brings out more of the Self  in all I am in contact with ... which adds to the emotional  ties and baggage of the past .... 

... When ... where was everyone? 

The fear in thy love

of explore ... the thundering tensions. I am in wind down and up mode in transition of retrieve and remove ... 

... to get to assist others ...

....where others think I am swarmed by social interaction ... I continually am met by professionals who supposedly do not realise after such terrible unrelenting isolation of hate for Mental Health ... I am OK ... 

I am not being funny ... but social media brings out more of the Self  in all I am in contact with ... which adds to the emotional  ties and baggage of the past .... 

When where was everyone? 

A Rush hour

market circuit walk to get the gas and electric... the faff about when down and out in life ... the places less to get said top up. Then you got get home and put the bleeding money on !!! 

And that still has connotations for thee...   the haste in life with a complex character ... cutting off the gas supply and dead in cold literally ... That still a shock in my system that makes me nauseated 

The Triage in

tentative travels ...

Stats in Facts 

The new hoard in the cloud ... the location foot print for reference point in how I was like a kid over enthused with my toys ... The gleen in images. And those now deleted .... and those now added never seen until this weekend last ... And those not locationed ... how we clutter without realising too !!!

All Hallows', Festival of Lights.

fire works and sparklers blasting outside, whilst the rustic blend of soups and mulled spices wafting out thy home. The super moon, a  

The autumnal colours, the teddy yellow to help the kids ... the glittering array of overstuffed shelves beckons now ... in this time of much gone ... but not forgotten ❣️

Flunctuations

in attempts. The brief glimpse of life outside. The darkness of times. The fight or flight. The random influxes of a life in organise. It disappears then resurfaces. The strangeness. The one thing in commitment the longer end goal. 

As can be

news of the weather was told at my door yesterday ... it was cold, apparently.

The brief times in a week out .... yesterday was in ... The  current sound of the patter of rain drops. The golden decaying brown leaves scattered on a lawn seen out of the kitchen window. 

The silver mists on the horizon. The sky recently lit with sparkles. The sombre gleam of the morning tears on the windows ... 

My mood intermix in sadjoy of much to come ... 

A little tad of expansion

an interview to attend ... The rigorous involvement into the volunteer world different. Another strand of options. 

All experience in getting all the ID needed, DRS and Confidentiality forms filled out and into my bag I used last year in this start of meetings, taster and training days. 

I have now to book an interview slot. I still have a few queries to chase up. The preps in co ordinating myself into a work environment comfortable outfit and shoes. The expanse of a building to contend with. The errands and experience starting with hours to suit and expand? 

This will be interesting ... 

Another task

....In deciphering others muddles... 

A mute point with a cashier in Aldi situated in the checkout nearest the entrance point to shop ... putting the hand basket back there when I had emptied out my groceries ... it was noted ... for a lot of customers do not do that ...

It just made sense to me ... and to them ...

Well ...it saved them some work ! 

****

And yet again another shambolic set of forms, not numerically ordered or set out on the page in alignment for printing ... 

Although I know how difficult this is ... 

It does not portray the organisation in good light for me to apply ... 

A point made if I sat on that committee or gave feedback! In this new world of accolades and back patting more modernised since last here! 

Supplies in mid evening

flow in a walk out in the darkness ... the stress pumping through the ears earlier in the day and a bit of a nose ache. My weaker parts pound in aches, in times of these. 

The food treats in the tease of time keeping me with the past, as much as I want it to pass in the whisps of the winds now back away from this time ... 

I have been trying to retrieve a Apple recipe or few that is escaping me. Appeltaart is one and the other is from my teenage years I made... 

It is all very well finding it online like I state. There are times a memory is jogged. The knowing that you cannot encapsulate old days. You make the new times. It is just nice to make food you made along in time and built up over the many times shared or not, that cannot be found elsewhere...especially within the regions ...